German Beer Wars

Brussels airport to Koln by train and suddenly everything is orderly and clean. I hadn’t thought of Italy as messy, but the tidiness in Germany is enough of a difference to make you take notice. We arrived late and immediately set out for an authentic Kolsch house experience for dinner – we found a local joint, large and loud and confusing at first but it gets easier as you have a few beers behind you. Kolsch is a light, super clear, lager-like beer fermented with an ale yeast, served in 20cl slim glasses that go down quick and are immediately replenished by the waitstaff who carry trays full of 12 glasses at a time. This is one place where you can go in and just ask for a beer – no menus, no different styles, just Kolsch and plenty of it. They mark your progress on a coaster to remember how many you’ve had at the end of the night. As far as I can tell, this is a traditionally male profession. These guys all wear blue shirts, long aprons and seem to enjoy the hustle and bustle. No sighting of ladies in liederhosen thus far… must be an Oktoberfest/Bavaria thing. Oh, and 90-95% of the patrons were men, too. Where do the German women go I wonder?

The next day we go on a full on beer tour – spending the day in Dusseldorf to try the Alt biers. We had four or five different varieties. Each bar only serves one kind, so we visited as many bars as varieties of beer. Altbier is also an ale fermented at lagerish temperatures, but it is darker, bigger and maltier than its counterpart 30 miles away. There is definitely a local rivalry/pride revolving around the superiority of one style over the other. I gather that the Dusseldorf locals regard Kolsch as a ladies beer – light and insubstantial. Whereas the Koln citizens value the purity and clarity of their style. There is a comic in Dusseldorf of a donkey drinking Altbier and pissing Kolsch, very funny for locals of Dusseldorf.   For me? All depends on the weather. Today, Germany was cold and rainy so it was kind of nice to have a bit more heft to our beer.

By dinner we’ve returned to Koln and tried on a few more Kolsch. Meat and potatoes are on the menu yet again. I don’t know how much German food I can handle! We try the pork trotter this time which seems to be the local favorite – pork knuckle grilled on the bone. We also discover here that in Koln, water is more expensive than beer. I think we ended up paying $5 for two wine glasses of still water, versus $2.25 per beer. By this time all of the different examples of each beer are blurring in my mind, but Alex is diligently examining and making notes like a good brewer should.